Never Blog Alone

Or more specifically, never blog when your 3 year olds are LEFT alone in the living room and you are in the other room. This is what will happen:



Yes, that's literally a red hand. And it didn't end there. Apparently they were playing band and they felt that they needed ratoos (their word for tatoos)...no more indy rock shows for these two!

Abbie's shoulder ratoo that connects with a dark blue line to her hand ratoo:


Another view of Abbie's artwork:


Ellie's new tat...note the detail of using the elbow, which is probably the hardest skin to scrub, by the way:


Another shot of Ellie's skin art:


So until next time, UGH.

Cheese with your Whine?

Yeah, I'll get back to the interview, but I just had to share this awesome set of whining by E today. She was pushing and thus was sent to time out. The first one is a bit long, but quite funny in that the whining is all but lost in the finger play. The second is the best whine ever. Seriously. And the best part is that it had nothing to do with the pushing or with the previous 2 minutes of talking! Watch and enjoy the Time Out sessions, and watch for an interview with a Monkey next week!

Meet the Gacek Girls, part 1

So another blog I read sporatically, 4tunate is about a set of quads just a little bit older than the girls. It's really good, and I highly recommend it, even if you aren't parenting multiples.

One of the things the mom, Jen, decided to do recently is to interview each of the boys with the same questions every 6 months or so to see how their answers change over time. This is the greatest idea EVER! So since I missed out on other great growth over time ideas (still mourning that I didn't get to do the buy a 12 month onesie when your kids are first born and take a photo of them in it every month until their first birthday), I jumped on this one. So without further ado, I give you Abigail Elaine, age 3 years, 5 months:

Say What?!

I get this question a lot: “OH! You have twins (to which I have to bite my tongue from saying, “NO WAY! I DO???”) So do your twins have a twin language? I don’t know. I don’t think such thing exists. Sure there are times that they just look at each other and seem to be having a conversation without words, but there was a time when I could do this with Amy, Kasey, and Shari, too, and not only am I not a twin, I am an only child.

There may be a sibling language, but I don’t think that’s limited to twins, or multiples. Every family has their things that are called something else…I am willing to bet that no one else besides the Johnson/Volkenants call a butt a “Henry.” Usually, it’s a name that the child couldn’t pronounce that becomes the malapropism for the whole family: Baka for Grandpa, Seza for Sarah, YiYi (pronounced with a long I as in eye) for Johnny. Now, it’s no secret that the Monkey and the Bear are very verbal, but even the best of the best have their Achilles heel, so to speak, and no pun intended. So without further ado, I give you the Clan Gacek dictionary, circa 8/2010.

• Killy liller: kitty litter and/or cat food
• Bada badas: our antique kitchen chairs to which the highchairs used to be
attached, but only those. Any other chair is a chair
• Puckywok: mushroom, specifically those from the Mario games
• Googogs: headbands with something on them, ie bunny ears, shamrocks, devil horns, etc
• Frissa: Marissa, the babysitter’s daughter (specific to Ellie)
• Cindydot, Cindy Bindy, Cindy Windy: Cindy, the babysitter
• Stinky Dot: the Goodwill store
• Milkilla: milk
• Daddy Milk: soy milk
• Mommy Milk: cow milk (which is weird because I don’t drink milk)
• Vamplayer: Vampire (specific to Ellie)
• Larry Berkaderk: Laurie Berkner, one of their favorite musicians (specific to Abbie)
• Larry Berknerker: Laurie Berkner, one of their favorite musicians (specific to Ellie)
• Clam bake: mostaccioli bake (specific to Chris and Sarah, weird because it doesn’t contain any clams)
• ________ Store: fill in a food in the blank, such as Pizza Store (Davanni’s), Burrito Store (Chipotle), Juice Store (Jamba Juice), etc. As with any rule, there are the exceptions such as the Q Store (Q’Doba, another burrito place) and Noodles. Noodles is not the Noodle Store, just Noodles.
• Wiggly cheese: Kraft singles
• Eff Effs: French fries
• Old McDonald’s: McDonald’s
• Colorado soup: Chicken Noodle Soup (specific to Abbie)
• Sunnypatch: jumping on the bed, preferably in just a diaper
• Caps: Catch (specific to Abbie and only when we are putting on socks and she wants us to “caps” her foot to put the sock on)
• Hangaber: hamburger (specific to Abbie)
• Purples: the girls’ bodywash. Over a year ago, we had a really big bottle of Baby Magic lavender wash, whose bottle is purple. I didn’t really like it, so I would let the girls use it to wash themselves, after I had used the good stuff to clean them. The pump on it broke, so I put the remaining into another squirt bottle, which is clear. We have since filled and refilled that bottle with other washes for them, but it’s still called purple.
• Poop juice: a cup of juice with Miralax in it (specific to Ellie)
• Leggings: legumes (specific to Abbie)
• Mackin: Napkin (specific to Abbie)
• Taco Bill: Taco Bell
• Chocolate Don's: Taco John's
• Gramma cheese: co-jack cheese sticks
• Gramma juice: Naked Juice (much preferred than the actual name since they often scream, “I want Naked!!!” in the store.

So yeah, next time you are having a hangaber and need a mackin, think of the Monkey and Bear. Until next time, leggings.

Sunday Funnies

Three-year-olds are funny, in all senses of the word, really, but here I mean "ha-ha funny." Don't go all Pesci on me! (If you get that veiled "Goodfellas" reference, yay!)
So anyway, back to my budding comediennes. Yesterday was a banner day for them. They were funny from sun up to sun down. Below you will find some of their gems. Enjoy!

Natural Progression:
Ellie wakes me up yesterday and says, "I think you should teach Daddy to do laundry." Struggling to wake up and comprehend what she just said, I said, "Oh, why?" "Well, he knows how to do ponies!"
Apparently the pre-requisite for laundering our clothing is the ability to successfully create a ponytail in Eleanor's hair.

Buttering Uncovered:
So anyone who knew Ellie as a younger toddler, knew she had this weird habit of sitting on the floor with her arms and legs straight out in front of her and would rock side to side. She did this from about the time she could sit up and move on her own to almost 3 years old. When she could talk, she named it "Buttering" or "Buttering my butt." Yesterday, both girls are in the backseat and out of the blue, Abbie asks Ellie about buttering. "Why did you do that, Ellie?" Ellie says in an astounded voice, "I don't know, but I just couldn't stop!"
Proof positive that addiction starts at a young age.

Po-TAY-toe, puh-TAH-toe, Creole?:
Still in the car and still in the back seat, Ellie looks out the window and sees a Taco Belle. "That Taco Bill," she says? "Yes," I said. "That's Taco Belle." "MMMMM, I like Taco Bill. You like Taco Bill, Abbie?" "Yeah, I like Taco Bill, Ellie!" Finally, I said, "Is Taco Bill anything like Taco John's?" to which Abbie says, "Chocolate Don's?!? Where's that? I want to go there!!"
Obviously we need to get a little more aggressive in either cleaning out their ears, or enunciating when we speak!

I know I say it all the time, but I really need to live my life with a tape recorder. Every day is a collection of bits that would put any comedian to shame. So until next time, Laugh. And you're welcome for the additional years of life!

When I was a kid, I had this album:


I loved it. I think I listened to it every day on my Fisher Price record player. One of my favs was "Why, Why, Why," with choice lines like "Why can't a mouse eat a streetcar?" and "Why can't a cow have kittens?"

Well, apparently it affected my genes, because the girls highly excel at why questions. Could also be because they are 3, but I prefer to blame Anne Murray. Dang Canadians and their feel-good music! But I digress. Below you will find some of Clan Gacek's more choice Whys:

> "Why is the sky bleeding?" - Ellie on the very red evening sky after a recent storm
> "Why his mom let him draw all over himself?" - Ellie upon seeing Twins closer Jon Rausch for the first time
> "Why it's raining in here?" - Ellie on why her head was wet while sitting on my lap at Toy Story 3 (I was crying.)
> "Why you don't shave your legs, Daddy?" - Ellie
> "What his/her name is? Why?" - Either of them on seeing other people out in the world
> "Why don't you wear jammies, Dad?" - Abbie
> "Why we named your car Johnny Cash?" - Ellie
> "Why did they break that road?" - Abbie on seeing road construction by Cindy's house
> "Why are those cars getting piggie backs?" - Abbie on seeing a semi carrying cars, presumably to a dealership
> "Why it [current day of the week]?" - Ellie.
> "Why Johnny Cash eats gas? - Ellie after we pull into a gas station to fill up
> "Why Johnny Cash's air conditioning doesn't work? Why Grammy's does?" - Ellie puzzling out broken car accessories
And one of my faves: "Why don't daddies wear bras?" - Abbie after helping fold/put away laundry.

Yeah, I ask that sometimes myself, Little Bear. Until we find out, peace and thumbs.

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

OH!! Would you look at that? I didn't fall off the face of the earth! It's been a while, I know, but I assure you that the Ringmaster and Casa de Gato y Ninas is still up and running, although now that we are in our "tremendous threes," every day really IS an adventure.

So a quick update: The girls are 3 yrs, 3 months going on 15. Seriously, 95% of what they say needs to be kept for posterity. If you follow my statuses at all on Facebook, you will know full well what I mean. The things that happen when they are around are sometimes beyond the pale. So here's a not so typical, yet completely typical example of life at Casa de Gato y Ninas right now:

I worked from home yesterday afternoon, but I had this meeting with my 3 supervisors and 2 co-workers that I had to call in for late in the day. Four of the five people work in our San Antonio office, so they don't really see or deal with personally (meaning face-to-face) on a daily basis. So I sequestered myself in our bedroom with the phone and things were going really well for about 45 minutes. Then it all stopped.
Ellie comes running to our door with no panties on, waving a plastic Target bag and SHOUTING, "ABBIE POOPED!!! ABBIE POOPED AND IT'S ON THE FLOOR!!" Abbie, who is now in the bathroom shouts back, "NO!! It's not on the floor anymore!!" as she is attempting to empty the contents of the potty into the toilet, which already has a great deal more than the 3 allotted squares of TP in it.
So here I am, phone clamped between my ear and shoulder, trying to wrangle a plastic bag from Ellie, clean a stinky, messy potty without water (because it's too noisy) while not gagging, wipe Abbie (which Ellie had started to do, and did a pretty good job, but then got distracted by the Target bag), AND find the poop that's on the floor while trying to listen to what the people on the phone are saying and praying that they don't ask me any questions.

So there you have it. Life with 2 three-year-olds...NEVER a dull moment.

Oh, and I did find the poop on the floor 10 minutes after the whole thing...Abbie had taken the washcloth from the towel bar and wiped most of it up off the floor and rug. So, on that note, until next time, dear devoted readers, Peace...and love